Like anything with becoming a mother, this is a skill that has to be learnt. Patience is the key. When I first expressed I didn't get that much milk. I thought two things:

• it's just something that I can't do,
  
• I mustn't be making enough milk for my son.

I now know that neither of these things are true.

Although it took some time to master, I now express everyday. I realized that there was milk going to waste through leaking. I didn't want this to happen. I noticed that the fullness feeling mostly happened at night, especially when my son started sleeping for longer periods of time through the night. I now express before I go to bed and once when my son wakes up for his early morning feed. It isn't much, between four and five ounces each night, but it's enough to stop the leaking. This expressing of excess milk also means that I have a bottle of breast milk in the fridge if it's needed.

Expressing is useful, but it will never be a measure for the amount of milk that you are making at any one time. My son gets far more milk than I can express simply because his suction is about ten times that of any expresser. I'll never know how much milk he gets, but he is happy and healthy and doesn't cry for food, so I must be making enough. Period! There is worry, especially at the start, that maybe you aren't making enough and should bottle-feed. I say that we need to have more faith in our ability to provide food for our children. But, this is a whole different topic altogether.

Expressing works for me. I don't worry about how much I get, but I know that it'll provide a meal the next day instead of being wasted. Thinking about doing it is harder than actually doing it. I promise.

Picture this scenario. My husband gets up for work at 4.30am. I roll over and try to get back to sleep. Notice the word  'try'. Sometimes I am successful, other times I toss and turn and visit that place between sleep and wakefulness. When my alarm clock does eventually go off at 6.30am, I am shattered. My husband calls me at 7am, sometimes later, and I am still in bed 'trying' to wake up. My overall state is not good or positive. I am rushed. I feel like I don't have time to do anything. But worse of all, I feel tired. This morning however, I got up with my husband at 4.30am. I know it sounds crazy but I'm working on a theory.

A little research will inform you that the invention of the alarm clock, and I suppose you can put industrialisation in there as well, dramatically altered our waking patterns. We don't get up with the sun anymore. I'd say 90% of us
use an alarm clock to get up in the morning. That 'beep beep' is an unhealthy interruption to your sleep. It's a jolt to our system. You can see why too. Our ancestors used to wake up naturally, whether to the sunlight or because they had had enough sleep. This doesn't really happen in our day and age. Our lifestyles are different, we stay up later, we use stimulants (TV, video games) before sleeping which keeps us awake...the list goes on. We rely on the alarm clock to wake us in the morning.

However, how many of us get up with that first 'beep'? How many of you sit up, turn the alarm off, swing your feet onto the floor, and say 'thank you' for the day ahead? Not many! We push the snooze button. We reset the alarm for a bit later. We turn the alarm off and then fall back to sleep. A vicious 'a-bit-more-time-in-bed' cycle has started, and we repeat it every day.

My theory is that if I get up with my husband, although I have ultimately been in bed for a shorter period of time, I end up being more rested because I haven't slipped into the vicious 'a-bit-more-time-in-bed' cycle. My sleep is now
unbroken by my husband's rising. Some people have partners that rise much earlier than they themselves need too and this isn't a problem. People say to me, 'I'd kick him out of bed, roll over, and go back to sleep'. But, I don't do this. I like to tell my husband, 'I love you' when we wake. We have a conversation in bed, I don't really know what about, but we have a chat.

Now I will admit that 4.30am is early and it definitely is not for everyone. But, it seems to be working. I don't feel rushed all day, nor do I feel tired. I have breakfast with my husband, do whatever needs to be done around the house,
go for a 4-mile walk, have a second breakfast (yum, I love breakfast), and get ready for work. I feel like I get more achieved in a day. I am more patient at work. I am also far more focussed. I use the time during the walk to focus on
everything that I am grateful for and to get clear what I want to achieve during the day. This gives me a more positive, clear, and determined outlook for the day.

So far my theory is working. The benefits certainly outweigh the thought, 'I could stay in bed for a bit longer'. My sleep at night is better, and I am actually tired at a 'normal' hour of night. I know it's only early days but I am glad that I have finally put this theory to the test. Here's to rising early, to catching the worm, and to saying 'goodbye' to the vicious 'a-bit-more-time-in-bed' cycle!

I'm embarking on new things at the moment and, although it might seem like a challenge to put oneself out there, I'm the happiest I've been in a while simply knowing that I am working towards my goals. The first step is always the hardest. I've been sitting on this for a while, for years in fact, and have finally come to the realisation that I just need to get out there and do it. I need to take all those small steps because each step builds my confidence, makes me more motivated, and leads towards my goal.


People and things really don't make you happy in the long run. You may gloss over things that make you unhappy, or hide those obstacles behind new things that you acquire. However, at the end of the day you can't stop that little
feeling that you have deep down in your stomach. I've realised this recently. All you need to do is take that first step and you will feel happier for it. Once that first step has been taken then the only way is up. I'm working towards
a happier life by moving towards, and focusing on, my goals. Can you say the same?